Normally, i'll put my iPod on shuffle in hopes that, that miraculous thing will happen where the exact song i need to hear comes on exactly when i need to hear it.
This happens to me quite often but never enough it seems.
Tonight, however, complete success in a most grateful way! See my other blog for details.
I can't help this, through generations (on both sides of the fam fam) of guitar players, pianist and druken singers; the music gene hit me hard. I'd surely die if i didn't have music. It's the only thing (other than writing) that has ever made complete sense in my life and that i've been consistent with my feelings for. A much-coveted goal for me.
I wish everyone could feel this way about something. I know that when i'm at the bottom of my darkest feelings, i always have music and it's never failed me. It kicks my confidence up and it bandaids all of my emotional wounds in ways that i'll never be able to explain with words.
Music accentuates all of my good qualities and i feel very strongly that without music, i'd probably be a shitty person. Not because it's a battle but because music is what humbles me and comforts me when i feel guilty or angry.
I will never be able to fully explain it's meaning in my life but i'll long-wind the hell out of you trying to.
The cheesiest thing i ever told anyone was this: "I bleed music notes".
How terrible is that?
Good lord, i'm such a nerd.
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