"Wouldn't mama be proud?"

In a recent boost of maturity, i've decided it's time for me to stop being childish about my paranoia and conspiracy theorist tendencies and start reading the paper and learning what's going on in the world again. A week and a half in to my new-found maturity, i've found that my passion towards people is amplified and opinionated. As a result, last night i sat in my closet/office/art room and cried while i read about how shitty the world can be. But, also in doing so, i realized that my desire to be a journalist is incredibly strong and i'm open-minded enough to do the job well. Regardless of how i'm viewed here, in my personal blog, the me that lives inside of my head is much more mature and observant. The way i'm affected by things and the opinions they create for both sides, i'd make a damn fine journalist and i know this. Not in an arrogant sort of way but in a way that creates ambition and willpower.
I know this is boring and i apologize but, sometimes it just needs to be said.

a quick realization

I have come to a sad, yet, unsurprising conclusion; a good majority of the people in my country are stupid. This, i did have an idea as to but, felt i was simply being arrogant in assuming things of such magnitude. But, the word is out. People are stupid.

circles

The past few days, i've been hiding from people. Though physically present, i find myself on autopilot dwelling in deeper thought. There really is no escape from being in this place of my mind, it simply needs to run it's course. But, while i'm always striving for happy - above content, it seems content is the only sturdy ground i have found recently. And in that, i find myself unhappy but, not in a sense that i'm suffering. It's routine. I am not a person who conditions themselves to routine. It's tedious and unfulfilling and unnatural.
For example: though i like my job and enjoy the people i work with; when i'm there, something doesn't seem right about it.
Something doesn't seem right about working almost everyday. I want to learn during my short time here on this earth. I want to observe and study and learn things; know things.
People say there is no other way but, by what means of comparrison do we have to validate this? I fear feeling this way will eventually leave me lonley but then i ask myself, "By what means of comparrison do i have to validate this?"
What else have i ever done?