the truth of MY life

The past two weeks of my life have been more than a milestone of growth.
All the fears that rested in my belly suddenly disappeared and things i never saw in myself suddenly became very apparent.
Things i'm capabale of; things i can change; things i've always been in control of but never saw the courage in myself to take advantage of. If there were only enough words and time to explain the recent happenings in my life without boring anyone to death, i'd surely be writing them all over the page.
In a mind-fuck of mind-twirling drugs that all great writers (though i dare not deem myself one) seem to have experienced, i wrote things in my journal i never knew myself able to write. i wrote poetry and beautifully sad words that writing, i remember not.

As such:

To feel so much
There is no better thought to humble-
The turmoil of it's darkest hour.

and then went to write ramblings that bear something deeper than the silly words.
to me, these words are everything.
To others, a mere moment of childish behavior weaved into silly words and immaturity and sinfullness.
But i care not.

In life
I've seen there to be-
the beauty and it's villian
A jarring image?
Reconsider
The possibility of deep emotions
For to feel so deeply
In space - in life
In question of our existence
That we; mere vessels
Of an unintended invention
There is no villian-
Only the glorious happenings of the nature of consciousness
We are ALIVE

These words live inside of my head without ever breathing air. Only the "oxygen" between the miles and miles of cyber space.
So here i belong, amongst my words and amongst my beauty.
That one day, all will see. But not today and not tomorrow. But one day. While i'm still breathing pure oxygen.