I discovered, sitting in a stiff room with fellow-food-handling-card-test-takers, that life is a dark comedy. It's true, if you're not able to laugh at yourself, life is going to be a lot longer than you'd like for it to be.
There i sat, 25 years old, amongst other mid-twenty year olds who've so far wasted their time and done nothing that they've wanted to with their life.
I can't really explain the humor in it but, it's there.
Regardless, in my small experience of some divine moment that shifted me, i kind of like that i don't know whats going to be of me, even just a year from now. This is the life i chose and for better or worse, i'm the lead role and instead of whining, i could be doing a lot better things with my time. i certainly have plenty of it seeing as i haven't really done anything else memorable. Just a year and a half ago, i would ride random public transportation routes just to people watch so i could write stories about the people i saw. What happened to that?
Oh, i moved from Dallas. But Phoenix has public transportation as well. They also have plenty of places to do volunteer work. They also have poetry readings and book clubs and plenty of other nerdy activities to preoccupy those who feel lost and confused. While all feelings are fleeting and i submit myself to temporary pleasures - it seems quite fitting that i live in a place where they are so many different things to choose from. And i've chosen to sit and miss my friends and family.
Excuse the incoherent babbling, in all the excitement of watching white trash take 45 minutes on a 25 question multiple-choice test, i realized that at least i have a good head on my shoulders and, buried somewhere deep inside of me lies the optimism that i've always clung to. It just took a bit of awkward humor to awaken it.
Finally. Ja-heeze!
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